*Disclaimer. I’m noticing a lot of people are responding to the title and first sentence. This post is one, big fat joke…which means most of the comments I’ve received so far don’t make any sense. Thank you for your attention. Now…on to the post*
Eat when you’re hungry, stop when you’re full.
Oh wait, life is never that simple. If it were, we wouldn’t need weight loss tip number two which is something like, “If you’re craving chocolate, don’t eat it. Instead have a dill pickle, it’ll curb your chocolate cravings.”
By the way, weight loss tip number two is a big, fat lie.
Okay, number three. Be honest about your calorie count.
Which is dumb because how can I get through the day if I stick to that 1000 calorie deal my doctor thought was a good idea? Hmm?
Because frankly cereal at night is the best snack ever.
But, if I have to count calories I’ll make it worth my while by enjoying my carbs.
So on to number four. We’ve all heard of using that red, green, orange rule, right? Well, thank God Starburst and Skittles have that covered and it requires no hard thinking on my part.
Number five. Eat one less bite.
So make sure that last bite is a big one.
Number six. Drink more water. Which is excellent since it mixes so well with kool-aid, lemonade and Bourbon.
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